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How to Write Wedding Thank You Notes (With Examples)

A wedding thank you note needs three things: thank the guest by name for their gift, thank them for celebrating with you, and add one warm line. The secret to getting through 150 of them is to write one great note, then change just two small things for each guest.

Take a breath. You don't need 150 different notes.

150 thank you notes. Your hand is cramping just thinking about it. Most couples sit down believing every single note has to be different, and that's exactly why the stack never gets smaller.

Here's the good news: each guest only reads their own note. (Aunt Linda is not comparing notes with your college roommate.) What makes it feel personal is their name, their gift, and whether they were there. Get those three right and the note feels written just for them.

Step 1: Write one note you love

Three parts:

1. Thank them for the gift. "Thank you so much for the beautiful serving platter..."
2. Thank them for coming. "...and for celebrating with us."
3. One warm line, the same for everyone. "We're so lucky to have you in our lives."

Dear Aunt Linda,

Thank you so much for the beautiful serving platter and for celebrating with us. We're so lucky to have you in our lives.

With love,

Emma and James

That's it. That's the note. Go get a snack.

Step 2: Add two columns to your guest list

Open your guest list, whether it's a spreadsheet or a notebook, and fill in two things for each guest:

• Came? Yes or no.
• Gift. What they gave, the way you'd say it in a sentence.

Most rows take about ten seconds. Use the extra line only for the people you want to say a little more to, like the aunt who rescued your veil or the friend who flew in from Denver.

Step 3: Your note fits every guest

With those two columns, your one note fits every guest. Copy these as they are, or swap in your own warm line.

Anyone with an extra line gets it too. Six little versions, zero writer's block.

What about money gifts?

Never mention the amount. Instead, give them a picture of the fun it's turning into, and use that same line for every money gift:

• Honeymoon: "We're using it for our honeymoon, and we'll raise a glass to you on the beach!"
• First home: "It's going into our first home, and you're invited to dinner once we're in!"
• A big purchase: "It's becoming a very comfy couch, and your spot on it is saved!"

Everyone who gave money gets the same line, and that's completely fine, because each guest only sees their own note.

Your wedding party gets their own note

Your bridesmaids and groomsmen weren't guests at your wedding. They were part of it. Give them a warmer, insider note of their own. It's a short list, maybe 6 to 10 people, so this is where the extra line really shines: thank each one for the thing only they did.

Dear Sam,

We couldn't have done it without you. Thank you for standing beside us, for the toast that had everyone in tears, and for the beautiful serving platter. You weren't just at our wedding, you were part of it.

With love,

Emma and James

Same method, smaller list: mark your wedding party on your guest list and give them this note instead.

When to send wedding thank you notes

• Gifts that arrive before the wedding: within about two weeks.
• Everything else: within three months of the wedding.
• Running late? Send them anyway. A late note is always better than no note.

A few small things

• Write to everyone who gave the gift. "Dear Marcus and Dana," or "Dear Riveras."
• Use the name they go by. "Aunt Linda," not "Linda Johnson."
• Sign from both of you.

The hard part isn't the words anymore

Once the words are done, what's left is the work: writing the same note by hand 150 times, addressing every envelope, buying stamps, and getting it all to the post office, usually in the busiest months of your life.

Send every note in real ink, without writing 150 by hand

Warmly Written turns your favorite wedding photo into art, and every guest gets their own card, written to them by name in real ink, stamped and mailed for you.

1. Pick a photo and see it as art. Free, about a minute, no sign-up.
2. Send us your note and your list, however you have it. The same two columns: came or not, and the gift. Add an extra line for anyone you like, and mark your wedding party if they get their own note. We set up every card for you.
3. Look through every card before you pay. Once you give the OK, a real pen writes each card to that guest, and we stamp and mail every one within a few days.

$4.99 a card, all in. The card, your note in real ink, the envelope, the stamp and the mailing. No minimum. If a card isn't right, we make it again.

See your photo as a card

Questions couples ask